27 April 2009

I'd wrote 2 different mode of mine on my diary during the above mentioned date. I just feel like sharing it here :)

1st Post: IN SATE OF CONFUSION…
Bluntly I have to divulge, I am in an utter of perplexity right now. Somewhere around this time last year, I had some squabbles with my mom about choices that I tend to seize in life. My dad would always agree with me but whatever the consequences may be, I shall have to bare it at my own risk.

I would have to admit that I am full of lust, craving for possessions that everyone else sense that would be unfeasible to attain. Let alone anyone would help me to soar through the mountains of ambiguity in the path that I have chosen. Eventually by then I was so full of ardor and I repudiate all the clamors around me and laid my foot here in the position I am at this juncture, right now.

Ya Allah Ya Karim..am I being paranoid of all that evolves around me?am I hesitant about my destiny? Am I not being gratified towards your blessings and bliss?Why is there a little voice in my heart that is howling for contentment, self-actualization?

I want to become somebody who is dignified, where my valor is poured to those in needs not dispense everything else to those with propensity of materialism. I hope I will not stifle in this journey of mine.Allah the Almighty, I am pleading for you to help me..


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2nd Post: WHAT I FEEL ABOUT MYSELF

I do portray myself as a woman full of inquisitiveness but yet eager to discern the wonders of life. Despite hearsay from others of my erratic personality, I still do believe that I am accountable for each and every move that I ever make. The amusing part is, I found out that every now and then this populace around me turns out to be a mirror of myself.

Thanks to friends and foes for pointing out my vitality and weaknesses most of the times.
I’ve learnt from their scrutiny of my behavior, they see me as what I churn out to be and even me myself didn’t realize what I have become.