27 April 2009

I'd wrote 2 different mode of mine on my diary during the above mentioned date. I just feel like sharing it here :)

1st Post: IN SATE OF CONFUSION…
Bluntly I have to divulge, I am in an utter of perplexity right now. Somewhere around this time last year, I had some squabbles with my mom about choices that I tend to seize in life. My dad would always agree with me but whatever the consequences may be, I shall have to bare it at my own risk.

I would have to admit that I am full of lust, craving for possessions that everyone else sense that would be unfeasible to attain. Let alone anyone would help me to soar through the mountains of ambiguity in the path that I have chosen. Eventually by then I was so full of ardor and I repudiate all the clamors around me and laid my foot here in the position I am at this juncture, right now.

Ya Allah Ya Karim..am I being paranoid of all that evolves around me?am I hesitant about my destiny? Am I not being gratified towards your blessings and bliss?Why is there a little voice in my heart that is howling for contentment, self-actualization?

I want to become somebody who is dignified, where my valor is poured to those in needs not dispense everything else to those with propensity of materialism. I hope I will not stifle in this journey of mine.Allah the Almighty, I am pleading for you to help me..


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2nd Post: WHAT I FEEL ABOUT MYSELF

I do portray myself as a woman full of inquisitiveness but yet eager to discern the wonders of life. Despite hearsay from others of my erratic personality, I still do believe that I am accountable for each and every move that I ever make. The amusing part is, I found out that every now and then this populace around me turns out to be a mirror of myself.

Thanks to friends and foes for pointing out my vitality and weaknesses most of the times.
I’ve learnt from their scrutiny of my behavior, they see me as what I churn out to be and even me myself didn’t realize what I have become.

I want u to be my berry!!!

Dearest Nancy..i can't afford to send a birthday gift for you straight to Singapore so I would like to dedicate this song only for you. I do really miss u sis, happy birthday and may God bless u!

You're especially special
There is only one you
And if you were a crayon
They would name your color true blue

We'll be buddies forever
'Cause together you'll find
That though we make other friends
We two are still one-of-a-kind

You're my berry best friend

What we have is so yummy
That it's never gonna end
There's a place in my heart
Just for you and me

You're my berry best friend
And you're always gonna be

You're the cherry on my sundae
You're the engine on my train
You're the music in my laughter
And my sunshine after the rain

You're my berry best friend

When you put us together
We make up the perfect blend
You're number one in my heart
And you're always gonna be


You'll stay in my heart
You are the best, best friend
...To me

Never be replaced

I was walking down the passageway from my class towards the cafeteria in hasty steps.

“Hey there, you’re from Penang right?” a voice called from my back.

I turned behind and render speechless to a shy boy that I met in my first class, first day of college.

Yeah, he was the one sitting alone at the corner of the classroom with huge file and note book of his and never stop jotting down every single thing that the lecturer says. He looks like a nerdy to me. That was my first impression towards him.

We exchanged smiles and started to chatter and walk at a snail's pace. There goes a camaraderie which ensued with earnest hearts.

More than 6 months after I cried so hard till my body can’t stop quivering. That was the first time i was dumped and I could still hear the voice of his patiently whispering to me..

”Never forget that I am here, I would always be. You’ll never loose me. I’ll hold your hands and help you out".

This boy never be bothered with the populace, all he knows that he would be the first person to shield me whenever others tries to bring me down. He never fails; indeed he clogged his ears simply to prove that he knows me better than anyone else.

There were so many times he came in the vicinity of me. Name it..he was always there.
When baseless accusations & enormous rumors made by some cunning bunch and years later I met with an accident and my hip was dislocate till the doctors was certain that I will be a handicap.

He was never ashamed to stand by me and again whispered the same assuring words..
“Be strong, I’m here..i’ve never gone astray. Please don’t let the tears flow or I will feel the throbbing as well.”

He keep on calling me day and night just to check on me..whether or not I’m doing fine. He just never stops. It has been 5 long years and he is still here, always mine..my true buddy. We grew up, evolving from adolescents to adults together. The best person that knows me for who I am and willing to accept me for what I were.

He is now suffering the symptoms of psoriasis and he tried to avoid me few months back but I snap out of it and went straight in front of his face.

“You can’t just run away like that because for all that I know, you need me now as much as I do. Who cares if you have patches all over your body? I care more about your heart rather than your outer shell. No way that I’ll ever let you go. I swear I won’t!”

I can never envisage my life without him.. my guardian angel.

yeah it's me!!

Hey mates..yeah I know I’ve derelict this blog of mine for quite some time. It’s just that I don’t feel like expressing myself, I guess.

My daily life gyrates around with normal routine. .i wake up early dawn like everyone else and begin the days like a ‘housewife’ (eventhough I’m not married). Why?I had to do all of the house chores from sweeping, wipe up the floor and even do BIT of laundry until noon. But you know what? I just love to keep my house clean & tidy. *naughty grin*

On the other hand, I still have to ‘babysit’ my pets which are 2 tortoises, a couple of cats, and 2 kittens. I am in charge not only towards my parents’ house but also to my lil babies (pets). All in all, Alhamdulillah I did not face any migraine symptoms since I’m back in Penang. Maybe as I’m fully occupied with my responsibilities and lately I still haven’t face any unnecessary behaviors from my surroundings thus the sentiment is simply relaxing.

What else have I been doing since I resign from ik? I’m setting up a small business on my own.* ROFL* Well yes, I am still running it slowly for a start but it seems to be just nice to keep me motivated.

Up till this moment Alhamdulillah, felt like as though saya adalah penganggur yang paling berjaya menguruskan mental & emosi saya sebaiknya. Income tu adela here and there but yeah, no more tears here.

Eid Mubarak this year..

Celebrating Eid Mubarak is nothing much than average glee this year I would say. Yes I felt the gaiety of reuniting with my parents n siblings but in a greater scope of the family (which includes relatives) as a whole, the feeling is just customary. Maybe the reason why I felt this way is because this year I’m considered as an ADULT=25 years old; or might be as the size of my family is eventually shrinking.. both late grandpa are gone few years back and also 2 of my beloved uncles passed away and now only left the remaining of us.

This year like any other years..we had our Eid prayers in Penang (granny’s house) but unfortunately, my father’s younger brother n sister were absent when the family photo were taken as they were busy with their spouse & kids at their own residence.

Later on that Eid noon, we manage to meet up with my father’s siblings and went to the graveyard and spent moments there with the whole bunch of family members. Soon after, we went to Alor Setar to celebrate the Eid evening with relatives from my mother’s side.

Phew~it was so tiring as we visited our relatives 3 days nonstop. But me, farah & afiq had fun traveling in my father's new ride as there's loads of space in there.

Well I have to admit that now I’m missing my office mates..and I’m still wondering what are each of them are doing now in KL..

SeLaMat HaRi RaYa

"persahabatan adalah hak mutlak kita bersama" - cuna 17sept09

Assalamu'alaikum..

Ku coretkan kata-kata ikhlas dari hatiku pada hari ini dalam bahasa ibunda.

Hari ini perasaanku bercampur-baur antara sedih dan gembira. Sedih kerana aku bakal meninggalkan sahabat seperjuangan setelah hampir 2 tahun berkongsi perit-jerih bersama serta hilai dan tawa.Ketahuilah oleh kalian bahawa kamu semua telah manjadi pemangkin semangat selama aku berada di bumi perantauan ini mencari rezeki.


"saya sayang kamu semua! muah muah" - cuna 17sept09

Aku turut gembira kerana kejujuran telah membawa persahabatan ini sebegini jauh sehingga kita merasakan seolah-olah kita dilahirkan sebagai sebuah keluarga. Hari-hariku tidak pernah sunyi bersama kalian malah segala kenangan manis akan kusemat jauh dalam lubuk hatiku dan harapanku moga ia sentiasa segar mekar mewarnai jiwa dikala kita di kejauhan. Gembira juga hatiku kerana dapat kurasa kalian semua sayang padaku, insan kerdil yang tidak pernah lepas dari kekhilafan. Namun yang paling membuat hatiku girang dan berbunga riang adalah kerana hakikat bahawa aku bakal pulang kepangkuan ayah bonda tercinta di kampung halaman.



Kepada sahabatku sekalian, selamat hari raya maaf zahir & batin.

Terima kasih untuk hadiah-hadiah yang kalian sediakan khas buat pemergian saya.

Saya suka semuanya! :D

2 weeks before adilfitri comes..

"no matter what, we'll still have each other don't we?" - cuna 10sept09

Dear mates, I'm sorry that I didn't have enough time to blog in here..lately I had to put certain things into perspective. To my surprise, I've decided to resign by end of this week. Yeah, I already did submitted my resignation letter to the bosses earlier yesterday. Can't belive I have been working here almost two years and now I finally decided to leave my set of jovial mates simply to be responsible towards my family back in Penang. Yes, I did cried at the time I break the news to my closed friends..but life is about striving for the path that we have chosen and eventually I shall carve my own footsteps.


"alhamdulillah..praise to Allah for the meal we had.." - cuna 10sept09"

Last week (10/9/09) I had iftar with fellow ik girls in Holiday Villa Subang. The food was so-so but it was the precious moment we spent together that makes it a special night. Will we ever be together in future like in this portrait i had? Oh yes... I never did have any celebration for my birthday..but the girls gave me some variety of gifts after we had iftar. I got a bottle of perfume, a set of brooch, a shawl, a purse and a bracelet. Thank you fellas, you are all so sweet to trouble yourselves to get me the birthday gifts.


"our laughter seems to dash out beautiful memories indeed" - cuna 13sept09



"hope this would never be our last pose together..promise me we'll never be apart" -cuna 13sept09

Weekend was superb as I had a day out with Felina, Ainun & Felicia. We had fun chit-chatting all day long just to keep ourselves updated with what's hot and what's not. Not to mention we strayed around KLCC and of-course did our joyous activity which was snapping photos here and there. LOL. It was pretty AWESOME with the girls around. We care less about the passers by but we did laugh our lungs out knowing that we were actually hyper jumpers during fasting month ;)


"never count fears beneath the steps but catch happiness by just smiles" - cuna 13sept09


"Friends NEVER say goodbye" - cuna 13sept09

A glimpse of 2 earlier weeks in Ramadhan 2009

Precedentedly before Ramadan, I had some arguments with someone who so-called acknowledge me as a buddy(konon). I never wanted to cultivate hatred in my heart unfortunately, so I did spare my forgiveness to that particular person (eventhough the anonymous never did make an endeavor to clarify things between us). Tak ape la..I boleh maafkan but the problem with me is..I never forget people who betray my trust especially those who did that without a solid reason.

Ramadan this year indeed is such an appeasement experience as I am here alone in Kelana Jaya without my family around but yet..the holy month does trigger my inner self to be more grateful towards the Almighty's mercy. Subhanallah... I can't believe with just a blink of an eye it is almost 2 years I had been living in KL on my own. How I crave for those who had filled in the spaces in my heart trough out these many years.

Tarawikh prayers this year is a brand-new undergo as well..the first time I set my foot in Masjid Tengku Kelana Jaya Petra (the one by KJ lake) with my new housemate. Fresh spot but yet the same prayer routine every Ramadan which sets tranquil somesthesia that lingers in my intuition. This smile carved on this clueless face is a gift from God and I am certain of that. :)

Last week I went back to Penang simply for the sake of fasting a few days with my parents & siblings. Simple captivating moments and again, my heart was filled with love and respect with them around. Little that I know, I wangled with my emotions and easily captured nothing but true happiness with my existing friends. Not to mention I've got new ones too in this holy month!

To my surprise, I looked at my comfy bed that I've been sleeping for past 1 year which is far more than what I've expected the first time I came to KL. Did I ever forget that I slept on the floor those days because I don't have money to purchase a mattress. Bila fikir balik rasa tak percaya..what an achievement I've accomplish..dulu I've got nothing.

Ya Allah, I am thankful that you have given wonders in life and everything else is simply the best!
Alhamdulillah..

I love my car too.. *ROFL*

--<-@Simply Felicity@->--

Yesterday was sort of merriment evening I would say. Me, Afeena & Danita rushed home and changed our garbs..and thank God, Liya (my housemate) was kind hearted enough to drive us straight to KJ lrt station.

Memories as an intern 2 years back shuffled in my mind within an instance . Those days I had to travel all the way from Taman Melati to KJ station, hop on a bus and stop at MPPJ stadium then walk to the office. But yesterday I was not alone on the train..both Afeena & Danita were such dears to tag along with me. My mobile rang but I was too caught up with the lrt-tied-up atmosphere that I didn't realize my mobile even beeps with few messages.

Once we reached Midvalley, I called those guys and they were already waiting for us at Kenny Rodgers. Like I've already expected..FULL HOUSE and there was no table left for us. My stomach was lurching and of course I'm hungry so I just went straight to Nandos instead. Thank God there's a table just nice for 6 of us. So we had our iftar, and it was a chaos there..our voices filled the whole restaurant. Yikes! I ate my whole meal okay?

Subsequently, we found some lil' spot to snap lame shots just as a subject matter of the night. Whats the point of having meals & hanging out together without a single prove of evidence? *evil grin* To sum up all the gestures in each and every scene.. it was such a flamboyant night!

a story that has never been told..

Back when I was in secondary school.. i met these 3 other girls who seems to be very warmth and bubbly as well. It all started with group discussions, later on we hang out as buddies.. cracked corny jokes and pitched for self-actualization during teenage years. A memory that shall never be erased from my mind. A sweet one perhaps :)